Hotel Rendevus

It was many summers ago and I was on my first trip abroad alone. It was a sleepy Saturday morning when I stepped out of the airport and got into the cab. My conversation with the cabbie went something like this:

Me: Hotel Rendesvus
Cabbie: WHAT?
(thinking I wasn't loud enough)
Me: HOTEL RENDEVUS?
Cabbie looks at me perplexed, so i had to hand over the paper i had with the hotel name written on it.
Cabbie: Ah. Hotel Rondevoo..

If that incident wasn't embarrassing enough, later that evening i was sightseeing and I asked a passerby, "How do i go to Boat Quay".. He said, "You mean Boat KEE?".

Now that left me doubt my English proficiency. I never felt that my English was bad.. it was not great but certainly not terrible as well. I have never said "Could not able to" EVER. So you know...  Then I got this mail which gave me some hope. It made me realise that it's not entirely my fault.. the English language is quirky as well. The fact is that in my mother tongue an A is always pronounced an A and never E or OH and there are no silent Hs and Ps. What you see is what you say and there is never a Spelling Bee competition. So I'm not entirely to blame here. English is a crazy language.

if you are still shaking your head in disagreement here's proof:

There is no egg in eggplant or ham in hamburger; neither apple nor pine in pineapple.
English muffins were not invented in England or french fries in France.
Sweetmeats are candies, while sweetbreads, which aren't sweet, are meat.
Quicksand can work slowly,
boxing rings are square,
and a guinea pig is neither from Guinea nor is it a pig.

And why is it that writers write, but fingers don't fing,
grocers don't groce, and hammers don't ham?
If the plural of tooth is teeth, why isn't the plural of booth beeth?
One goose, 2 geese. So, one moose, 2 meese?
One index, two indices? Is cheese the plural of choose?

If teachers taught, why didn't preachers praught?
If a vegetarian eats vegetables, what does a humanitarian eat?
In what language do people recite at a play, and play at a recital?
Ship by truck and send cargo by ship?
Have noses that run and feet that smell?
Park on driveways and drive on parkways?
How can a slim chance and a fat chance be the same, while a wise man and a wise guy are opposites?


When a house burns up, it burns down.
You fill in a form by filling it out and an alarm clock goes off by going on.
When the stars are out, they are visible, but when the lights are out, they are invisible.
And why, when I wind up my watch, I start it, but when I wind up this essay, I end it?


How can the weather be hot as hell one day and cold as hell another?
Why do overlook and oversee mean opposite things?
How come abbreviated is such a long word?
Why are they called stands when everyones sitting?
Why is it called building when its already built?
Why does slowdown and slowup mean the same thing?

the silly language doesn't quite know whether it's coming or going.
______________________
Things to ponder over isn't it? They could have borrowed the word Rendezvous from the French, but can't they fix the spelling before adding it in? Kuch likthe hain.. Kuch bolte hain.


Onestly, who else feels the same way ;)?